Surrendering, Again

As mentioned earlier, I’m in a bit of a funny place when it comes to home. I have a house with a fenced yard for the pups. It’s a good house. It’s paid for, and it’s appreciated in the time I’ve owned it.

I purged, and purged, and listed it in the middle of May when the inventory was low. I received an offer the next day. It was a contingent offer based on my buyers selling their home. Because of a glitch in my listing agent’s software, my house is showing up as pending, not contingent, thus making it impossible to advertise open houses, etc.

We’re six weeks in, and the buyer’s house hasn’t sold which puts me in that funny place when it comes to home. The what-ifs are working overtime.

With the Fourth of July coming, people are coming into town, and we will hold an open house the old-school way, with signs pointing the way and balloons, and hopefully delicious snacks. The buyers are also having an open house, and if they don’t get any offers, they will withdraw their offer on my house, and my house will go back to active status and appear as a new listing. Unfortunately for me, the housing inventory has improved substantially according to the number of red dots on the real estate sites.

Now, enter the surrender part that always leads to the trust part. Whilst I believed I was surrendering to God’s will, was I actually? The original thought was to close my shop and stop the bleeding of money, sell my house, pay off some debt, and live off the proceeds from my house for up to four years. My original plan was to write, not only this blog but the meditation that came to me more than a decade ago. That meditation has brought me closer to God, and it’s something I feel needs to be shared with others so they too, can feel closer to God and be more open to His/Her plan.

Putting our faith in God’s plan can be scary, even though we/I know the outcome is better than we/I can ever imagine. Taking that leap of faith requires surrender. It requires full commitment to letting go. Not half-assed (apologies), but full holy-cow, this is happening commitment.

I have a feeling you’re getting the picture of my true dilemma. With the original thought of selling the house, I was creating a safety net, a parachute for that leap of faith. Surrender in its most childlike view, like I’ll give up chocolate for Lent this year. We/I can read all the books/blogs, take all the classes/workshops, attend all the meetings, buy all the gear, and learn all about surrendering and taking the leap of faith, and yet never leap. What I’ve done is dipped my toe into the pool of faith. Leaping requires surrender, full-on, holy-cow, letting go of EVERYTHING!

I’ve let God and God’s universe know what my true dreams are, writing the meditation and having that be hugely successful, and having a retreat center for women with any type of cancer and their caregivers, and anyone who simply needs to get away, be part of a community, and be cared for. Maybe the only way to get to the dream, let’s call it point D, is to surrender it all and let God do His thing, which may include jumping to point S, circling back to point C, and perhaps even a brief stop at point B, doing a nosedive into Point H, reemerging at Point P, and ultimately jumping off the cliff, I mean, leaping into faith at Point PM (Present Moment).

Of course, there are no coincidences. The daily affirmation for today reads: “Every unexpected turn in my life is nothing but a blessing. I no longer force or try to control everything. I surrender and move with grace in the alignment with the calling of my spirit.” – Lucas Notes

Be Not Afraid

For years now, my mom has been making a catalog of songs for her funeral. First, she was doing it, then I was doing it, and now she’s back to doing it. I ended up making one as well. She’s been going to a lot of funerals lately, and she’s been taking notes. Be Not Afraid is at the top of her playlist, or maybe it’s my playlist.

Fear not, be not afraid. I’m feeling a little angst over the logistics of everything regarding the upcoming move, hopefully, and the future. Family would say something to the effect of, “We told you so,” or “That’s what we tried to warn you about,” and they’d be right of course. Like that chick that has to crack open its own shell, I have to do the same thing.

Ultimately though, I have to trust the divine process. I’m definitely getting hung up on the details, like forwarding mail. Where? If I do the RV thing, or even the car thing, I’ll have to make sure I have the essentials, like envelopes and stamps, besides the toothbrush and toothpaste. I have to surrender.

In my meditation today, the word tranquility came into my heart. The definition of tranquil, according to Webster, is ” free from agitation of mind or spirit” or “free from disturbance to turmoil.”

Hence, the glimmer of God, letting me know to fear not. Mother Teresa said, “We don’t have peace because we’ve forgotten that we belong to each other.” She also said, “We fear the future because we are wasting today.”

I’m going to embrace the day in trust and willingness to do God’s will.

Best Laid Plans

I had every intention of writing first thing this morning but then one thing after another crept in and snatched the morning away, and here it is afternoon. My original intention was to go to the library to write with noise-canceling headphones because people really don’t use library voices anymore.

I first noticed that phenomenon when writing the history of our family and our family graphite company in honor of the company’s, at that point, upcoming one-hundred-year celebration. I began with a writing retreat in northern Montana, drove through western Montana, and through Idaho. I stopped along the way and wrote in small-town libraries. I finished the first chapter in Challis, Idaho, without the noise-canceling headphones.

Small-town libraries are the hub of any town, especially in rural areas. Usually, the computer stations are completely filled, and rarely are there cubicles available, with open tables being the preferred workstations. People talk in their regular voices, sometimes loudly. There’s no whispering, no “keep it down” nor “lower your voice.”

Maybe it’s because I’m used to doing work in a quiet environment and have a little too much of the easily distracted, “squirrel” mentality. Regardless, when I was writing the company history, it became clear that writing in my cubicle in the office was never going to work, so I opted for the library at one of the clubs downtown, with paneled, book-laden walls, thick patterned carpet, and the smell of history, rich stories, and likely a bit of mold within the pages.

That was by far the best place to write. Unfortunately, at that time the general consensus was if you weren’t working in the office, you weren’t working at all. Obviously, none of them had ever worked from home. That all changed with Covid.

So this morning, I was all set to go to the library. The Livingston Library is no different than the small-town libraries I encountered in Idaho; I just hadn’t been there, until a couple of weeks ago. Since I’m going to be moving soon (hopefully), I’ve been downsizing and prematurely sold my printer. What was I thinking?

This move though, is different in that I don’t have a destination/house in mind. I’ve been considering the van life and getting an RV, or at least a converted van. In a couple of weeks, I’ll rent an RV to see if I can handle it, or more so, if I even like it. I’ll travel with both dogs. Many have offered their thoughts on that. Those people leave the state in the winter, and have said that it’s nice to have a “home” to come back to.

I get that. Even with my short jaunts, it is nice to roll into the driveway and do laundry, and see if there’s anything left in the fridge that hasn’t turned. I’ve thought about keeping my super slick, owned vehicle and just stopping at Airbnbs along the way, but many of them are not pet-friendly. I am hoping that I’ll book an Airbnb for months at a time, once I figure out where I’ll be.

Basically, I’m in a holding pattern until the house closes. I wouldn’t be able to get a van or travel or find out where I want to be. I’ve got my St. Joseph on my shelf, and I know he’s got my back. I’m just having an off day on trusting in God’s divine guidance. In my heart, I know it, and I trust it, but in my head, it’s like watching a ping-pong match; it closes, it doesn’t close.

It seems like every time I start feeling unsettled and make even the most minscule move, like renting an RV for a day, and return my focus on God’s divine guidance, a glimmer of hope appears. It’s like in meditation when the mind starts to wander, bring your attention back to the breath, which is, of course, God’s divine guidance anyway. Each breath we take is a gift from God.

For what remains of the day, I’m going to practice being grateful for every breath, every moment, and for every bit of hopeful guidance I receive, especially in the holding pattern. It’s all a gift.

Habits

Habits initially have a negative connotation, like cussing, interrupting, gossiping, drinking, smoking, etc. There are good habits, of course, like flossing/brushing, meditation/prayer, exercise/rest.

What about fishing? Do you have pesky, ingrained habits you just can’t shake? It’s more common than you think. As an instructor, it’s my job to figure out what’s wrong with someone’s cast and attempt to fix it. That’s why I get paid the big bucks. “Attempt” is the key word here because most people have years of bad habits that show up in their cast or beginners who assume that it’s a certain way.

A couple of weeks ago, I attended the premier of Mending the Line, a film about a veteran who heals by learning to fly fish. It was filmed in Livingston and surrounding areas and we, as Lodge’s Larder, catered part of it. It was fascinating to see the number of people who worked on the film. The film was actually pretty good, even though some of the fishing was sort of fake-y.

Anyway, I ran into a gal I taught last year and her husband. He said he still had to tie on the tippet and fly for her. Whoa! What happened? She completely had it figured out last year.

I took her out yesterday, and we started on a friend’s pond. She wasn’t nearly as excited as I was about the pond, but casting into a pond sets the foundation of a cast and from there, you can move onto bigger and faster water.

Her cast showed she was letting line out on the back cast, thereby changing the length of the line and timing, thus reducing the energy in the line. Perhaps she has a desire to change her past in some way, so she feeds line into her backcast. No, I think it’s just a bad habit.

Once I made her aware of that issue, she fixed it, but another bad habit took its place. It’s a bit like root cause analysis where you just keep digging until you uncover the real issue. It could be that something from the past.

Actually, I think it has a lot to do with control. Sometimes, most times, people want to control where the line goes and how much line goes out, so they bring the rod forward too fast or let line out on the backcast, or, or, or… Once they realize that by surrendering their energy to the rod (sounds like God), then the line flies through the guides to the desired goal, aka rising fish.

Wow, that does sound like God, doesn’t it? Surrendering our control to God exponentially launches us to His desired goal which far exceeds our own expectations.

She and her husband fished last evening, and though they didn’t catch anything, she didn’t let line out on her backcast, and they had a lovely evening.

This weekend, I’m going to surrender and see what happens.

Conveniences

A few months ago, perhaps longer ago, I was encouraged to purchase a rice steamer. “You never know what’s going to happen in the world, so you should consider stocking up on flour and rice,” a friend advised.

At one point, I had an Insta-Pot, but I got rid of it somehow because it was too big for one and I like cooking. Sure, it’s hugely convenient to throw things in there, leave for the day, come home to a house smelling of deliciousness that has brewed all day, and then enjoy. It just didn’t work for me. It was too convenient. I’m more of a let’s-see-what’s-in-the-fridge-and-go-from-there sort of gal.

Maybe because my kids are grown and don’t need to prepare something to feed a crowd, and only cooking for one. Maybe I’m simply trying to simplify and don’t want/need a bunch of gadgets in my house.

Whatever the reason, I did away with the Insta-pot and a year or so later, I purchased a small rice cooker, with a measuring cup, spatula, and steamer tray.

The first time I used it, I didn’t add enough water and the rice was more than a little crunchy. The second time I used it, I nailed it. It was perfect. I used the leftover rice for fried rice and it was delicious.

I’ve tried the making rice and using the steamer tray for veggies and that was fine. For some reason though, when I’ve done that, I’ve also roasted cauliflower and the cauliflower wins by a mile as far as taste and texture. The recipe is at the end.

With all my packing up, I inadvertently packed not one, but two steamer baskets, and with artichoke season in full swing. I ended up purchasing another basket because I wanted to cook two or three of them at one time. I thought about using the rice cooker but didn’t know what to expect.

Last night, I decided to use the steamer function for the lone artichoke that had been sitting in the fridge for a while. The tips had started to brown. I cut the top off, trimmed the poky bits at the end of the leaf, and cut the globe in half. It was amazing; no boil overs, no running out of water, and the leaves were tender and firm. I used them as crackers for a smoked trout dip I made.

This morning, since the cooker was still on the counter, I decided to make oatmeal and again, no boil overs, and it seemed like it was ready in half the time. It could have been that I wasn’t keeping a constant eye on it and that’s why it didn’t seem to take as long, but it was so convenient, and of course delicious.

I’ve lived without a microwave for years and have missed it only once in a while. There are some conveniences that I don’t think I can live without, and that rice cooker may be one of them.

Cauliflower Recipe:

-One head of organic cauliflower, cut into 3/4” slabs. – Oil (olive, avocado, or mct). – Santiago smoked pepper blend and salt to taste.

Preheat oven to 450 degrees F. Put slabs and extra bits on a parchment lined sheet pan or cookie sheet. Sprinkle with oil, seasoning, and salt. Bake for 30 minutes.

If you wanted to be really fancy, you could sauté some garlic, red pepper flakes, and capers. Add a little lemon juice, zest, and some Parmesan cheese, and toss it on the cauliflower.

If you don’t have time to make the sauce, don’t worry, it’s good simply roasted.

May we recognize and embrace the conveniences in our lives and be grateful.

Limiting Beliefs

Where are there so many songs about rainbows?

I’ve lived all my life with limiting beliefs. Maybe you have also. “You can’t do that, you’re too,” fill in the blank.

Anything that gets in the way of our true calling is a limiting belief. When we finally tune into our true calling, there are plenty around us who are more than willing to shine a light on their limiting beliefs they believe must be our beliefs as well.

How would the world look if Thomas Edison succumbed to limiting beliefs? “Uh, Tom, I don’t think that’s such a good idea. The light bulb, really? That will never work. You might want to think about getting a real job.”

Along the Camino, those pesky thoughts are part of your everyday experience, in the form of blisters, achy joints, missing toenails, exhaustion. That’s when they creep in and say, “Why are you doing this? You’re never going to finish. You’re too,” fill in the blank.

Only prayer, consistent prayer allowed me to take the next step. Hail Marys fell in time with my foot falls and got me to the next place. Granted, it was slow and painful on so many levels, but I did what I could, and I believe that’s good enough for God. Stretching ourselves beyond our comfort zone, relying on God for everything, that’s what God wants because He loves us so much.

Limiting beliefs have been around since, well probably forever. Definitely in Jesus’ time. When he said all we need is “faith the size of a mustard seed” to move mountains, he was talking about limiting beliefs. “Do not be afraid,”

I believe God wants us to reach for the stars, that’s why we are all born with a dream/s. It’s our choice in this life to take the steps and obey our divine guidance to reach our dreams or take the limited, fear-guided route.

As long as we remain God-centered, either way is good enough. The funny thing is, once we obey God’s guidance, we are changed so much so that our focus becomes our dream, and our dream becomes our reality. Heaven on earth.

Perhaps it is precisely that change that most unnerves the well-meaning naysayers. They are afraid of how you becoming your best self might affect them negatively. I believe we were put on this planet to raise one another up, not knock them down.

Let’s say two people get married and in the beginning, it’s all rainbows and unicorns. At some point, one of the couple decides to make a change, whether it’s losing weight or going to church. Fill in the blank. There’s a little something human that happens, either within the person who wants to change or the mate, and unwittingly sabotages the whole endeavour. There comes a point when one or the other accepts that this is still the person they married and in every life we must grow, and what we ultimately want for the other and ourselves, is to be our best self possible.

Once we get to that point, where we realize that we will get through to the other side, maybe saying Hail Marys with each step, there is no stopping us. Once we realize that we are so much more than our limiting beliefs and remind ourselves with every thought and every word that leaves our mouth, we can move mountains.

We have to faith it until we make it. Once we realize that every thought we have, negative or positive, and every word we speak, becomes our reality, we realize we must change our narrative. If we have to say affirmations into the mirror everyday, then do it. Limiting beliefs will try to hold us back, try to push us down, but we are so much more than our limits, so say it, scream it into the mirror, “I am abundantly blessed. I am beautiful inside and out. I am more than enough. I am prosperous. I am generous. I am fit, firm, and flexible in body, mind, and spirit. I am just where I am supposed to be. I am doing just what I am meant to do. I am vibrant and vivacious. I am exceedingly healthy. I am loved.”

“Beginning when we are girls, most of us are taught to deflect praise. We apologize for our accomplishments. We try to level the field… by downplaying our brilliance. We settle for the passenger’s seat when we long to drive. That’s why so many of us have been willing to hide our light as adults. Instead of being filled with all the passion and purpose that enable us to offer our best to the world, we empty ourselves in an effort to silence our critics. The truth is that the naysayers in your life can never be fully satisfied. Whether you hide or shine, they’ll always feel threatened because they don’t believe they are enough. So stop paying attention to them.” – Oprah Winfrey

From one limitless soul to another, embrace the change happening right now.

Father’s Day

Tool/knife in lava

Christmas train set

Happy Father’s Day to all dads, young, seasoned, soon-to-be dads, and anyone who has served as a father figure in one way or another. Thank you for being the best role models you can be.

I miss my dad. He was one of the best. He was brilliant, loving, a little stubborn, tough when he needed to be, and taught me so much about everything. When I was in high school, I was the only one at home and every night, whether I wanted to or not, my dad and I played backgammon. We talked about school, friends, boys, and it became our thing even as an adult, we played backgammon after dinner.

We shared several qualities: being the youngest in our families, both geologists, loved God, fishing, trains, and backgammon.

With my explorations coming up, I’ve focused a lot on my great-grandfather. I want to see where he had coal mines and lumberyards, and write his story in a little more detail. What’s occurred to me this weekend is that I’m focusing a lot on my dad as well.

Our graphite company started because our great-grandfather went from mining coal in Wyoming and southern Illinois to mining graphite in Alabama in 1917.

If you recall your history lessons, World War I was happening in 1917 and graphite was considered a strategic mineral because it helped strengthen steel. It’s still considered a strategic mineral and is in things you use everyday. Really, you might ask? Yes, it’s still used to strengthen steel, it’s in drilling materials, brake pads in your car, alkaline and lithium-ion batteries, and the reason I can type this blog on my phone is because of the graphite foil beneath the screen. Graphite is an excellent conductor of heat and electricity.

One day, my dad and I discussed graphite occurrences in the United States.Some of the best deposits were in Alabama, Ticonderoga, NY (home of the Ticonderoga No. 2 pencils), Colorado, Montana, and Texas. The last mine to close in the US was in 1990, in Montana.

He told me, a meteor slammed into earth around current day Dillon, MT. The impact was so intense that it turned the outlying rocks to graphite.

It just so happened, I was in Dillon this past weekend. A friend and I went to Gracie’s that had a little bit of everything and a cool rock wall. I’m in the midst of downsizing so I wasn’t going to get anything, especially not a rock, but I couldn’t resist. I believe it’s a Native American tool/knife that got surrounded by lava. The tool/knife has flint knaps along the edge making the edge very sharp. I know my dad would have some interesting interpretation.

I also went to the Beaverhead County Museum and that was fascinating and Dad would have loved that also, especially the Marklin HO scale train they had, complete with buildings, old time miniature cars, and a train depot with tiny people standing and sitting.

Every Christmas, my dad and brother set up a Marklin HO gauge railroad track in the basement with a paper mache mountain Dad made, with a chair lift and a Swiss chalet and running water wheel. There was a slot car track that went around a rundown castle on another paper mache hillside. We had a train depot, and my job was to place the people and the trees around the train set.

Sunday, Father’s Day, I’ll be fishing with a friend in Yellowstone National Park, a place my dad was introduced to in the early 1950’s through a Princeton geology camp. He wanted to share that experience with everyone and ended up creating a GPS audio tour of Yellowstone.

Even though my dad is knocking rocks in heaven, he’s remains with me in my heart and always.

Happy Father’s Day!

Stretching

Stretching, it’s good for us. When we do it, it feels great. Norman Lear stretches (with the help of a trainer) every morning, and he’s 100. He’s said that he can’t live without it.

When we stretch our muscles, we get to a certain point when we feel it, a pulling, a tension. If we stay in that position, there’s a point where there’s a slight ease in the tightness, a release, and we’re able to go a little deeper.

When I teach people to fly fish, I’ll grab the line after they cast, and pretend I’m the fish. They need to set the hook, creating the initial tension, and then work the fish in by moving the rod over one shoulder at a forty-five degree angle and then move it over the other shoulder at the same angle. There’s the slightest bit of slack that occurs when they move the rod over their shoulder and I instruct them to strip in that slack, keeping the tension. Working the fish in in such a manner, paying attention to the slightest bit of release of line to pull in, and keeping the tension on the line increases the chances of landing the fish.

Paying attention is the key to both. Noticing when to put a little more tension on the line and when you can go a little deeper in a stretch, creates great results. It creates more flexibility in muscles and bigger fish.

The same is true for meditation. Spending quality time with God every day stretches our spirituality. When we pay attention to our breath, noticing where the energy of the breath trips up, where we are hanging onto tension. We can breathe into that area and release all tension. Mine usually occurs in my jaw, and as soon as I notice it, I’ll breathe into it, it will release. Sometimes I notice it several times until finally the energy simply flows naturally.

Just imagine what stretching ourselves beyond our comfort level can do. It opens our minds to possibilities and brings about flexibility, reducing rigidness.

Today, I’m choosing to stretch in every way, body, mind, spirit, hopefully a fly line, and pay attention to where it leads. What is there to lose? Nothing. We only gain growth and awareness.

Fear vs. Faith

We are surrounded by fear. My favorite show is CBS Sunday Morning because the stories are interesting, and the reporting is good. My sister first introduced it to me. One time, I spent the night at her house, and we shared her big bed with a softened linen duvet cover and so many pillows. Properly propped up with fluffy pillows, we watched.

To be honest, it has become my favored source for world news. Our local news is just that, local. Local government, local weather, sports, and no mention of the world outside of Montana.

I’ve since added pups to my bed and a steaming cup of espresso to my CBS Sunday Morning routine. Rudy loves the “Moments of Nature” segment and any animal segments. I record it, not so much as to watch it later, which I’ve done (sometimes with an espresso in hand), but mostly to fast-forward through the commercials.

The majority of commercials are pharmaceutical ads throwing fear in our faces. If this hurts, take that. If that hurts, take this. There’s even an ad that reminds me of Hairspray, the musical. People are singing and dancing, the jingle is catchy, and I suppose no one knows/cares what it’s for because the commercial is entertaining.

Fear of the unknown can be paralyzing for many people. One of my cousins lives New York and will never leave. Everything he needs is right around the corner so why consider venturing out from the known? I know many people who are completely content with the status quo and have no desire to see, or do, or learn, or try something new, and that’s okay. There’s no judgement, just not the way I’ve been called to live my life.

My daughter is graduating tomorrow with a PhD. She’ll wear the square hat (Tam) and the colored hood. It has been quite a road and she has faced fears because she has endless faith. It is a faith that is contagious and fierce and I could not be more proud!

I’ll miss her in-person graduation, because she lives in Ireland, but I may try to wake up at 3:30 am and watch it.

Every day, we are given countless opportunities to choose to live in fear or faith, and we must remember that every time we choose one or the other, that choice will feed on choices going forward. If we choose to live in faith, faith opportunities will present themselves. The same thing for fear, the more we choose to live in fear, the more fear shows up.

So I’ll continue choosing to fast-forward through those fear-driven commercials, count my blessings, wake up at 3:30 am and watch my faith-filled doctor accept her diploma, and thank God for every faith-filled opportunity presented. It’s all good. It’s all great, and it’s going to be fantastic!

July 13 – Family Dynamics

There are times when family members drift in and out of our lives. As parents, we are meant to be available to our children in an instant. God forbid we aren’t available when they call. We could be sitting around all day waiting for them, and then we decide to run a quick errand, miss the call, and guaranteed, we will be in the dog house, their world will fall apart, and thousands will be spent at a therapist’s office because of the abandonment they felt.

Okay, that may be overkill, but you get the idea. When everyone is under one roof, you adjust to the “nest;” everything runs just so. One goes off to college, and the nest is no longer balanced, so you adjust again. Say that child comes back for a break of some sort, and the nest needs to be balanced again, making room for the missing chick.

This goes on and on until they have all left the nest. Guess what? You have to adjust. Again.

When I went off to college, my dad said, “I’m not sure what your mom and I will talk about.”

I called them the next Sunday, and they didn’t answer the phone; they were off traveling the world, having found something to talk about.

Has this ever happened to you? You’re going along in your adult life and go back for a visit, surrounded by parents/siblings, and you drift right into old feelings and habits like you’re twelve again. To me, that feeling means I haven’t kept in contact as often as I could.

About a decade ago, thanks to a family business class I took, we started having family meetings with my siblings and our mom. When our dad was alive, we held the meetings twice a year. It starts with a prayer and there’s always a time to check in, to bring everyone up-to-date as to the goings on in that person’s life, their family, and their business. Some of my family see this as a waste of time, but I think it’s one of the most valuable parts of the meeting. I’ve seen how having that time to share softens the sometimes sharp edges that can form around a person. Having that time brings empathy, compassion, and honor to the person who is sharing and to the listener. It makes room in the nest for everyone, and from there, we can rebalance. From there, we become stronger, knowing that our family has our back.

Now that he’s gone, the meetings have fallen by the wayside and they are few and far between. People have become prickly. Impatience has crept in.

I’m watching a friend’s dog, a dog that until last week, had had a dog sibling. She’s been staying with us for the past few days, and we’ve adjusted. She gobbles her food and anyone else’s, while mine are grazers. They have to be fed separately and the bowls are removed. My dogs haven’t been wild about eating on a schedule, but they’re adjusting. We’re all adjusting.

Yesterday morning, they woke me at five, so I decided to have to dogs work on my schedule. I brushed, yoga-ed, and was in the midst of getting my bolster for meditation when the dogs shifted just as I shifted, and the table that held the huge framed pastel portrait of my children as wee little ones, got bumped. The frame, all its glass, wood, and adorable faces started falling toward me, glass side first. I caught it and hefted it back onto the table when it slipped, and the frame hit me in the head hard. Thankfully, the glass didn’t break, and I only came away with a bump.

Part of me thought, “That’s it, this can wait, we’re going out for a walk” but I didn’t. I wanted to give God that one-on-one time. I made sure that frame wasn’t going to move, sat down on that bolster, and did my meditation. Only then did I take them for a walk, and they ran like a pack.

The family dynamic is all about adjusting, setting boundaries, giving space, taking care of yourself and taking care of others, and being flexible. It’s putting the oxygen mask on yourself first and then putting it on the child. It’s taking the time to share with loved ones. It’s listening. It’s praying. So, if that family dynamic frame ever hits you in the head (hopefully it won’t), offer it to God, the only one who can sort it out anyway.